Emmeline Vance

It feels amazing waking up to this...

I could get used to how this feels.

I think I already have.

( [Left beside Taveon's bed along with a note] )

( [Left on Liza's beside table with a note upon her pillow] )

( [Sent by owl to Tracey] )

[Written via dictoquill]

Christmas.

I'm not ready for you.

It's only a matter of a day or so until Christmas eve and I still have so much to see to that I feel dizzy with all the responsibility. Mum is hardly in her right mind to be hosting such a party, and has not made sense enough to see to a single detail, but she simply insists at every opportunity that she comes across me in the house to remind me that all her friends must be invited.

I've not even had a chance to see to my own shopping. It's sure to be a disaster.

sigh

Can we be simple and everyone just let me know what they'd like to have for Christmas? My mind cannot take the complexity of trying to imagine them up.

frustrated scratching

I need to get away

[Taveon]
Please...Please...Come get me.
[/end]

I found the box of books my mum collected for my sister and I when we were young...I'd forgotten how beautiful the illustrations were. I'd nearly forgotten why I loved stories so deeply.

Things finally seem to be right in my world.

For once I feel...happy.

( [Elizabeth] )

( [Tracey] )

( [Taveon] )

( [Private to Self] )

Everything is quiet.

It seems a bad time of the year for everyone to grow so distant. My mum has noticed me about the house more often, and she's offered to give me a bit of the garden to work on. I suppose she thinks if she can give me enough of a distraction, I won't go off to find trouble.

Can someone outgrow trouble? Or will it always come around eventually to find them?

I've considered quitting my post at the shop, but then I'd really have nothing to do.

I woke up this morning for the first time sober alert. The sun was barely up, and I went down to the kitchen where the maids were still chatting before breakfast, and made my own kettle. They talked to me while we drank our cups of tea, and even offered to bring me some seeds from their gardens. They were very kind. I don't know that I've ever stayed long enough to talk to our staff.

I'm not sure what I'm becoming. But it felt good to be up before noon, and to have time to do things instead of waste the day.

But how long will that really last?

There's always some trouble lurking around the next corner.

There was a whole shipment of books today in the shop. For once I was perfectly content to sort through them. The calm was nice compared to the whirlwind of activity I've put myself through. I'm aware that I've done so to myself, but I'm worn thin. I'm absolutely exhausted, and not at all healthy.

My mother is away with the ladies of her garden club, and the house seems bigger than it's ever been. I feel like such a child to want to fill it with noise and people and to never sleep because sleep is awful in such a lonely place...But then I don't imagine she'd like to come home to what my parties can do to a home.

( [Private to self, may possibly be weak enough to be read by very close friends] )

Decidedly I am depressed. Why, you might ask, and may very well regret doing so...For as frivolous as it seems...I've begun to imagine I've too many shoes.

I never thought I'd hear myself say something so vile, but I've no idea which to wear, and it's driving me absolutely nutty.

It was with a great deal of blackmail pleading that I convinced my designer to complete my dress before Saturday. I'm rather proud of it for the time he was allowed.

( Spell-o-taped in journal, hexed against Taveon )

...Do you feel up to some early celebration, Tavy-darling?

( [Tracey] )

Right...so. Men are right gits, and that's sugar coating it. Taveon has obviously decided to make a life of this, and now has his nose buried in some contractor's book...Oh but if only that were as kinky as it sounds, eh, Tavy?

And all the while he's left me with absolutely nothing to do. Yeah, so he brought over the tartan for the Halloween Soiree, but I dropped it off yesterday to be sewn up before the event. And that leaves me at square nothing.

I want to get out and do something. The city is singing my tune, and I'm not about to hole up because he's got other plans.

Right. Who wants to party with the queen of the town?

I propose a little All Hallow's Eve soiree. Everyone is invited. Everyone must have a costume, and at the end of the night if you've found the person you're supposed to be with, you'll get an extra little surprise. What does everyone think? I'm ace at planning a good party.

( [Hexed Against Taveon] )

Bother!

I seem to have lost my favorite pair of earrings, and of course they'd go walking off the night that I most need them! If anyone has seen a pair of dangles, they're silver and sort of...dangly...And...well not that anyone tends to find earrings lying about everywhere, so if you spot a pair, chances are they're mine.

But...moving on from that little panic. The reason that I need them is that...wait for the anticipation...

...

..

.

I have a date tonight! I was returning that god awfully ruined dress today downtown and what would you know but a photographer snatched me up and asked to take my photograph. And before you scold me, it was in a loft full of models and managers, and out of the whole crowd he picked me. He's absolutely, adorably American.

I'm meeting him downtown at this really swanky new getup they've opened in the art district. I can hardly contain myself...Now if only I could find those damned earrings!

...And my left shoe.

I think I'm going to be sick...

[Added a half hour later] Scratch that. I'm sick, and waking up at seven o'clock to find the sun going down would have been a pleasant surprise had I been able to peel myself off the tile long enough to look.

Why is it that staring down into your breakfast from the day before can remind you how long its been since you've eaten?

There's an opening in Rome tonight...I'm not entirely sure how I'll manage along... Taveon, may I have one of your anti-nausea potions pretty please with fairy dust on top?

I should have gone shopping today, but blast if I am calling Sergio to open shop to pick out a dress for tonight. I'll just have to settle on that piece he sent over last week. I really despise when designers grovel, but I'll feel less sorry about sending it back ruined if anything happens to it tonight.

Now where did I put my shoes and why is the room still spinning.





...Not again.

I could really use a pick-me-up.

I'm the life of the party.
So contagious.
All the boys wanna catch me.
( But I'm just playing. )